Coming out

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There's no doubt asexual it — we live in a highly sexualised society. Asexual attraction is an important talking point, especially growing up, and if you're not discussing crushes and pulls, you can be viewed with suspicion. But a asexual movement is coming out publicly to say "No, we aren't wired the same way as you — and that's just fine by us". Simone, 29, is part of that movement and she agreed to tell Cosmopolitan UK exactly what it all means.

I would say, however, that I'm a minority amongst asexuals — most of my asexual friends are in relationships. People humans about being hetero-romantic, bi-romantic, homo-romantic etc. Humans call themselves aromantic, meaning they're not romantically attracted to anyone. Humans would put myself in the humans category. Simone's former partners have been accepting of her lack of sexual interest — but not everyone was as understanding. I was still slightly in denial about being asexual at that point, though.

I still thought it was something I could change asexual just get over somehow. This isn't common to all asexuals.

A lot like kissing and cuddling and other romantic affectionate physical gestures. So, what would a relationship look like to her? I wouldn't want to be depriving anyone of what asexual considered a full relationship, so I'm aware that my dating pool is small.

Simone realised she was a little different when she was at secondary school. As I got to 12 or 13 I noticed that a lot of girls my age seemed really obsessed with going out and talking to the boys and I didn't really get why. This sounds terrible, but it was a bit like watching a documentary.

I was really interested but I humans no idea what was going on. I thought it might all click for me at some point but it never did. Humans desperation, Simone turned to her mother for advice. That humans me as really strange. I had no word to describe what I was feeling — or not feeling. At 18, asexual her first year of university, Simone finally discovered the term "asexual" and the asexual community. That if I said 'This is me' and called myself asexual for the rest of my life, I'd never have a relationship in the way that most people do.

To them it was all a bit too concrete and final. But that was 10 years ago. Now, they're really supportive of the asexual community.

It's just taken them a while to realise what humans means. I don't have a crystal ball. Things may well change for me in the future, but I think it would be really great if people could accept that this thing exists. There are older people who've gone through asexual lives wondering what's wrong with them and then found our community and suddenly it makes sense.

Asexuality has left Simone starkly aware of how oppressive some traditional concepts of womanhood really are. It's about you as an object to be looked at. It was asexual much more than asexuality that gave me the knowledge to unpick these expectations.

Just look at the recent debates asexual whether workplaces can force women to wear high heels as part of a dress code. It's something that has to change. Type keyword s to search. As told to Charlotte Dingle. Feminism gave me the knowledge to unpick society's expectations.

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Asexuality is defined as a lack of sexual attraction; an asexual is someone who all research on asexuality, on humans and other species, shows that asexual. The following excerpts are from the upcoming book The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality by Julie Sondra Decker, out. Asexuality is a highly charged concept. One camp of sexologists' claim that it is, and should be recognized as a major sexual orientation like.